Category: Parent Talk
My name is Pipi. At the age of two I was diagnosed with a disease called Retinitis Pigmentosa which is a condition affecting my eyes. I have been slowly losing my sight my entire life. While I have always been night blind and have never been able to drive, I lived a fairly normal childhood and teenage life. As a senior in high school I had to start enlarging some of my textbooks because they were too small for me to read.
I went through the next several years living as normal a life as possible, attending college, working in the childcare field, etc.
Over these years I have continued to lose more of my vision slowly. The change was small enough that I wouldn't notice it for years. I would just continue adapting however I could to continue living my life not really looking at the big picture.
Over the past year I've really noticed how much my vision has deteriorated. I now find myself unable to just adapt to what I have.
I currently live in a small town, population less than 1200. While this is a safe place for myself and to raise my daughter, I feel trapped. I am 20 miles from the nearest city. There is no public transportation to get there. I am unable to independently do simple things such as grocery shop at an affordable store, take my daughter to the doctor, get that perscription needed after business hours, and many other things that are taken for granted. I have to arrange for a ride in order to accomplish everyday tasks. I do not have the skills necessary to move to a larger city at this time. While I am currently employed, the children I care for are reaching ages where they will no longer need me. Being in this small town, I do not have other opportunities for employment.
I have taken the steps to attend a comprehensive training program at the Colorado Center for the Blind. I will be moving to the Denver area for 6 to 9 months. I'll live in an apartment, use public transportation to get to and from the center, attend classes such as home management, travel, braille, and technology. I will do all of this while under sleep shades. I will learn to do all of these things and many more without using any of my remaining vision.
For those reading this who don't know me, I am also a single mother of a beautiful, intelligent, four year old little girl named Savannah who is my life. I have been fortunate enough to work from home so that she has been able to be home with me everyday. We have never spent more than 48 hours apart since the nurses first placed her in my arms. The Colorado Center for the Blind have been wonderful in working with me as a single mother. My daughter is able to move to Colorado with me. She will need to be placed into childcare for the first time in her life while I attend classes. We will have a 2 bedroom apartment to ourselves instead of the usual arrangement of two people sharing it as roommates.
I have done research and learned quickly that childcare is very expensive. I will not be able to work while attending the training program. Since I am a resident of Kansas, I am unable to apply for state assistance through Colorado and Kansas does not pay for out of state childcare. I have been researching grants, scholarships, and sponsors with little success so far. I will continue seeking funding. -
I am not very good at asking for help and this is a real struggle for me. I'm disappointed in myself for not being able to pay for my daughter's childcare on my own. I am able to contribute one third of the total cost, but still have a large sum to raise. I am asking for help in my journey to make a better life for Savannah and myself.
I need to raise $6,500 to pay for the other two thirds of Savannah's childcare costs. I would greatly appreciate any help I can receive whether it be monetary, resources for donations, help spreading my story to as many people as possible, or any other support.
If anyone has any questions, I am very open and willing to answer.
I can be reached via
Email: blahblahblah@iampipi.com
Twitter: @blahblahblah410
Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/blahblahblah410
If you would like to contribute to helping me make a better life for myself and my daughter, you can donate through paypal.
Paypal address: stateofconfusion410@gmail.com
You can also send donations to my home address, but I didn't want to stick it out here for the entire world to have. Please feel free to ask and I will give it out.
I would like to ask that you please spread my story to others. Every resource, contact, and dollar will help.
Thank you for reading my story and for any help you are able to give.
Pipi
Hey Pipi. It's Ryan. We haven't spoken in a while, but I have your back if you need any support. I'm in school now and I unfortunately have to watch my funds but if I ever have any scrap cash left over I'll be sure to remember that you are in need.
I am a graduate of the center in Louisiana. I can tell you it was the best decision I ever invested in. I love the freedom I have as a result, and I'm sure you will as well. There will be some fun times, and there will also be some difficult times where you've got to toughen up and stick it out. However, what you put in will determine what you get out of it. I wish the best of luck to you and your daughter. I'm sure she will admire you for doing this.
Please private message me if you need any more support. I prefer not to give out my information on here.
Ryan
Hello.
I live in Colorado and I have a suggestion to offer you that could help.
Because you will have an address here, when you arrive you should ask to be assisted to get a Colorado ID.
Whith this tool you may then apply for state help.
I have seen people come from other places do this, even different countries. I do not know how much time you'll have, but this suggestion will help you with this child care.
here is my suggestion. why not join the NFB and then get a grant or loan from them? i know that they give extremely low or no interest rate loans. good luck to you.
the loan program is gone last I herd.
You know, the NFB might even have resources for child care due to the fact you are coming to the center, so that's a great suggestion.
Yes, I do believe the loan program has been gone for some time. Wayne, while NFB provides childcare at its big events, like National and even some state conventions, it is not provided for a long-term situation like a stay at a center. Also, to get assistance from the state of Colorado, or even a Colorado ID, I believe she would have to become a resident. If that happened, her current state rehab agency would have justification to stop paying for her attending CCB, so I don't see how that would work out.
She'd just change her case if she is in fact getting the center paid from her state rehab. That is possible.
On the child care, I was thinking maybe they'd have resources to help her pay, or some funding available for it. I don't know much about the NFB, but they do have money for things and maybe some resources that could make child care not an issue.
I don't know if having an ID makes you a resident, but it does make you elgible for state help along with an address.
Posting this couldn't have been easy; I'll donate as soon as I'm able to, definitely within the next week.
Wayne, I don't think she is meaning to move to colorado longterm, and I could understand why. This is why a state ID or a residence change could actually hinder her progress more than anything. She's interested in moving back to her home in her previous state, so and her case in Colorado would not be valid or could begin right away, so her funding for the center would not be granted right away either. She has a child, so she can't just switch residencies at her whim, because she might be getting state benefits that can't be suspended or switched around, even for a short while. She needs to keep things as stable as possible for her daughter.
Pippy, I understand and sympathize with your situation. I think it's very brave of you to have circulated your request online throughout the various blindness-related email lists and communities. I'll certainly see how I can help in the near future.
When you say that Kansas will not pay for out of state childcare, what exactly do you mean? It would seem to me that this should be a service provided to you from voc rehab as a part of your Individualized Plan for Employment. Have they at least provided the reasons why they cannot provide this service to you? If they are not willing to provide the service as childcare, perhaps you may wish to consider asking for a maintenance fee which could help cover the cost of childcare while you are attending the center. I am sorry to hear you are going through this difficult situation, and I hope you are able to find a way to work it out.
ok. here is my question and observation. first of all the OP has not responded once to any suggestions. all she has done is ask for money. now, i am completely opposed to folks using others to get free money from so, bare that in mind here. so, here are a bunch of other blind folks who, probably, are not well off, deciding to give her a bunch of cash. so, say she gets a few thousand dollars but, not enough to pay for what she says she needs it for. do you think she will give it all back because she did not make her goal? no way! she will just keep it and have a big party or buy new clothes, drugs, beer, cigarettes, whatever. it just really bothers me how gullable some people are, donating to someone. if you really have a need to help someone get fish, is it not better to teach them how to fish themselves, rather than just giving them fish from your meager stock?
Hmmm and you see that is why you have to give things like that time, to see how things pan out.
Now, I have spoken with Pipi before, and in her defense what she has said is true. She does have a child, and though we have not spoken much she does not seem to be the type of person that would take your money and run.
Dana, on one hand I do understand your skepticism. I too, would be skeptical of this if it were being posted by someone completely unknown to me. If you don't know Pipi at all, then I can see why you feel the way you do. But plenty of Zoners do know her. I do not claim to know her extremely well, but enough that I would help her out, and likely will, in a few weeks when I'm in a bit better financial position. And in a way, helping her with this now will be teaching her to fish, so to speak. Learning the independence skills now will enable her to better work, care for her daughter, and support them both in the future.
However Pipi, I wil agree with Dana on this one thing. I do think it would be a good idea for you to post again here, to answer both the suggestions and questions you have received. Putting the request out and then not paying attention to the topic won't help your cause. That's not meant in a cruel or harsh way, I'm just trying to be honest. Hope I haven't offended.
Pippy has posted her request on other lists and forums, and to her credit, she has responded to the ones which were on email listservs. has anyone thought that perhaps she just hasn't had the time to log back into the zone and take her stance once again?
agree with joanne, Alicia and bernandetta!
Actually, she is not only asking for money, also for recourses and contacts. I can understand where you are coming from, but if she needs help and has a child, why not? I'll contact you, Pipi...
I am trying to provide resources.
Writer, what I have in mind is stable. She'll be here 9 months or more. People move about all the time and switch states all the time.
I did this, without a child of course, when I went to college, and was able to receive help right away.
I'd also think a call, if she's not done so, or a brows of the Colorado state website could help her.
As to the poster that stated about people taking money and running, I've seen this happen with people I've known closely for years, so it is not unreasonable of a thought.
One lady had cancer, requested help to pay her medical bills, the family and friends pitched in and raised the funds. She did exactly what the poster said, just enjoyed the gains, not pay her bills.
I'm not suggesting this is the case, but it is can happen.
When a person donates money they should allow it to be let go. You gave it in the best of meaning, so if it doesn't get used as you thought you should not expect it bac nor care what happen to it is the way I think. I gave it, it is given.
Hey y'all,
I'm sorry that I haven't written on this board before now. I did attempt to this morning, but lost my entire post when I took too long and got logged out. I am attempting again now.
I haven't purposely been ignoring it at all. I have read everything now. I just haven't had the time to log in and post. It isn't an excuse, but hopefully a little into my life as to why. I am a single mom and a live in nanny. That does keep me rather busy. There have also been other personal family events that have kept me away from this board.
Alicia, you haven't offended me at all. I like that you put your opinion out there and well you are right.
Dana, also, you haven't offended me. I am glad that you are skeptical and honest. You don't know me from Adam and I find your comments intelligent.
I am going to attempt to address everything written on here so far and will do my best to check in more often.
I first want to say thank you for all of the support. It means more to me than I know how to express in words that y'all even took the time to read this and comment.
Wayne, for several reasons, I am unable to do what you have suggested. I can not switch my residency to Colorado because Kansas is funding my training at CCB. I do not have the skills to move to the Denver area, establish residency, and then go through the process of getting signed up with Colorado voc rehab and getting funded through them. If I had the skills necessary, I'd be less likely to need training from CCB. It is also not right to double dip the system. While I'm sure I could go get an ID the first day I'm there and such, it isn't right. It also isn't just me. I am trying to be a responsible parent and do what is best for Savannah and myself. The transition away from the life she has always known is going to be a difficult one as is. I need to have everything I can in place ahead of time to help make the transition a good one for her.
I have been in contact with the NFB on a national level after several attempts to contact the NFB of Kansas with no return emails or phone calls. I have sent a letter to the NFB and have spoken to them. I most likely will not qualify for their grant program.
I have not found any scholarships or grants that I qualify for due to not attending an accredited school.
I have spent hundreds of hours researching and contacting many organizations, businesses, foundations, and individuals.
I am in contact with the director of CCB who is working with me on finding funding for Savannah's child care. I am also in contact with my voc rehab counselor who is also attempting to find a way to help fund her child care.
Kansas does not pay for out of state child care because well they don't. I know that isn't really an explanation. Voc rehab is part of the same state funding for child care, food stamps, and the likes. I understand this. Unfortunately there isn't a training center in my own state that could give me the training I need.
Crazy_Cat I will talk to my voc rehab counselor about the maintenence fee to see if that will work. Thank you for that idea.
Write Away, I am hoping not to return to my home town. My need for training is so that I can get out of this small town that I am trapped in. I do not have plans as of yet, but am working on our future. The first step is to get the training I need.
Dana, I need to receive training. In order to do so, I need to find a way to pay for my daughter's child care. In the event that I don't attend CCB, I will return the money donated to me. I am scheduled to attend CCB in August. If I am unable to find funding by then, the money donated will continue to sit in the account opened to save for child care until I am able to attend CCB. I don't expect you to believe me and again I understand you being skeptical of me, but I'm raising money for a specific purpose. It isn't right to use that money for anything else. If there is money I am unable to return, from annonymous donors or such, the money will be donated to charity.
I also would like to say that I've done more than just ask for money. I've asked for suggestions, resources, and support as well.
I don't really understand the whole fish analogy. As I am seeing it I am attempting to learn to fish myself.
I have not only come to the "blind community" with my plea for help. I have gone to everyone I know. The zone and a couple of blind parenting lists happen to be part of that.
I also wanted to let y'all know that I have been and will continue working hard to get the money necessary to pay for my daughter's child care. My letter put on here and other places around the internet is not the only thing I am doing.
I am in the process of planning a fundraising breakfast through The Fraternal Order of Eagles, which is a charity organization that I belong to and am an officer on the local and state level. I am also having a raffle to be given away at the breakfast. I have been working on the raffle part only since Friday and have 3 prizes and another almost definite.
I will also be having a couple of raffles at the state convention of the organization I mentioned. With the help of my mom, I am also working on a jewelry fundraiser as well.
Again, I apologize for making it appear that I wasn't paying attention to this board. I never wanted to give the impression that I thought I could post and ignore y'all because that definitely isn't the case.
Please feel free to ask questions as I don't mind answering them. And again thank you for all of the suggestions.
I will unashamedly say this: I know Pipi some, yes. People say what you will of me in the quicknotes or take me how you will: but I believe I'm a pretty fair judge of character: to me, Pipi is solid gold.
I would contribute if I could, but right now we're tied up with expenses.
But Pipi is solid gold. She ADOPTED this little baby girl, as a single mother, and manages her situation with bravery and wit. Some people whine because their shoes get a little dirty. But Pipi? Not a sound: not a fuckin' sound while she's trying to make it, working from her house trapped in a small town. Maybe some of you don't know how this goes, but a trapped existence is hard, so-called independence skills or not.
I will be lucky in a month to get outa here and back to the city where I may come and go as I please. Pipi? Has things much harder. And we haven't even mentioned the process of losing her sight. I've personally never had any, so never had to deal with that particular difficulty of adapting oneself.
And while many women complain that their men don't fold the towels right, or buy things that are the wrong colors, Pipi's dealing with real struggles, and, again, not making a sound. I do know her a bit, yes, but it was other people told me of her struggles, and me reading some things where she put her heart out there on these boards about her little girl.
Anyway, take this how you will, but just consider the contrast between Pipi and a lot of other chicks out there you see. In light of her situation, and again, she gave that little girl a home, opened herself up to that baby of hers. That's more than a lot of us have done, me included, by the way.
Pipi, please don't mistake me. I wasn't criticizing you for not having posted to the board, only suggesting that it would be a good idea. I am glad that you did, and you don't have to defend yourself or your actions in all this, for what you've done or haven't, etc. You're doing the best you can with what you have, I know that. If Kansas is willing to pay, go with it. Colorado DVR sucks, and whether they would pay could be an iffy prospect. Thank you for the update.
while I've never spoken to Pipi, I do have to say that it's rather unfair to judge what she does with the money she's given. cause, although she has stated where it's gonna go, and what will be done with whatever can't be returned, she doesn't, and shouldn't, have to justify things, outside of sharing her story to try and get the help she needs. it's no one's business, period.
when someone chooses to invest in another person, financially or otherwise, they're willingly giving to him or her. this means that, since it was done from the heart, they shouldn't give a rat's ass how it's spent. cause, if the one giving is arragont enough to say, "but, it's my money," clearly, they should've thought twice about whether they wanted to give to someone in need, in the first place.
truthfully, I wouldn't blame Pipi for treating herself to something with at least some of the money, after all she has been through.
I don't know if what I suggest would be double dipping.
If I have any more suggestions I will share these as well.
And I as stated have to agree. Once you have given anything it is given and gone from your hand.
What is done with it is no longer a concern.
Pipi I'm so sorry that your in this situation. I have a baby girl and I don't know what I would do if I were in your shoes. I understand scepticism but I think that there are right ways and wrong ways of saying things. What you doo with the money if you don't go for the training is your business and nobody else's. Personally, I feel that people who have questioned your motives need to appologise to you because no mother would want to put herself and her issues on display like you have. Only a mother with as much love for her daughter would put herself through that. I'm unfortunately not able to assist financially but I'll support you and talk to you whenever you need someone. Speak to you soon and take care.
Taz.
Actually with all due respect, I think we (anyone who may potentially donate) have every right to make sure that the money will go where it's meant to go.
Not everyone knows Pipi as has already been mentioned;
I know for myself, I wouldn't want to have donated money only to perhaps discover that it's gone to a drug habbit or something. Lol. This is just an example though.
Although I've never really got to know Pipi, she was around here when I use to be years ago so I know she's jenuine.
And even though I myself don't necessarily agree with asking for money online, I understand that for some, there's just no other way and the fact that you Pipi said you were doing all this other fundraising stuff, is commendable.
I shall get in touch with you and we'll figure out a way I can send you some cash. I love kids and am hoping for my own very soon. :)
But just remember all what I said above, people havve every right to try and understand as much as possible, where their money is going; there's a lot of sick people out there.
Good luck Miss Pippiness! If anyone deserves anything its you and Little Miss Pippiness. I hope you can raise the money and get the independence you deserve.
Agreed.
Rachel, I disagree. as was said, if people are really that concerned about where money they've chosen to donate is going, they should seriously think twice about that decision. clearly, people who have this view, aren't prepared for what may possibly come with the territory.
that's right Chelsea; that's why they ask because they would still love to donate money as long as they know where it's going; that's fair enough.
Anyway this is about Pipi. (I haven't forgotten; will get in touch on here in a few mins).
Rachel, it seems you misunderstood me. I wasn't agreeing with you that people have a right to know where their money goes. I was saying that once they've decided to give it, it isn't their business what happens with it from that point.
When ever large businesses donate money, or charities, or non profits and such things they ask exactly where the money is going and have lots of rules set up to know were it is going and how it will be used.
Some even ask for monthly, or quarterly reports.
It is the person that gives alone that decides if they care or not, but it is the practice of organizations to know.
If she went to a church, or some organization they'd most likely ask for prooff she is enrolled in the Colorado Center, and she might have to give references as well.
Here is an idea, if you've not tried it. Have you appealed to local businesses?
Chelsea, you misread me obviously. I was saying that is right that if people want to donate, they do risk not knowing where their donations are going, but the morral thing to do is to reply to every question that potential donaters may have, which is what Pipi did and she had no problems doing it which is fantastic and something she should have expected.
Thanks and let's just leave it here; it's not a post about who's right or wrong, it's a post about Pipi; Time to move on.
I'll say this much, I have a much better feeling from Pipi's posts than I would have had my most recent x come on here with the same request. My x was demonstrably and frighteningly irresponsible with money and would probably have used any donations she received for her own personal gain rather than that of her child. She also doesn't like to follow even reasonable rules, so appealing to local businesses was an abysmal failure when we had to get help paying the rent after she blew most of the money. I was just lucky my folks weren't willing to see me end up on the streets. So needless to say I wish Pipi luck and hope everything works out in the end.
Here I go again not writing in very often. I'll try not to write a book here.
I wanted to give an update.
So far people have been generous enough to donate $1101.63
I have been working on 2 quilts to raffle off at the fundraising breakfast. They are local NCAA college themed. I also have $100 in sonic gift cards and a few more items.
I will be checking into selling bottled water at our local hicktown 3 day carnival that is coming up at the end of June. I may also be doing a raffle there for a quilt with the school's mascott and sports theme. I had started making it last year to use as a football blanket to keep warm when my nephews play, but will hopefully finish it and use it to raise money instead.
I am still working on getting more donations for the raffle.
I've been in contact with the local Lions Club. They are going to see if they will be able to help as well. It is a very small club, but every penny helps. :)
I'm still looking into other options.
Chelsea, thank you for all that you've written here. Doing something for myself will wait until I can fund that myself. Honestly finding a way to pay for Savannah's childcare is the nicest thing that can be done now as it will improve our lives immensely. It means so much that you have spoken up on here with your support and reached out with kind words to a stranger. :)
Leo, I already told you elsewhere, but want to say it here as well. You brought tears to my eyes with your words. Thank you. I don't see myself as anyone special and Savannah has been a gift to me. I'm definitely the lucky one. :) I'm just trying to be the best mom I can be for her. You thinking so highly of me well... just thank you.
Alicia, no worries. :) I didn't mistake you at all.
Wayne, I'm checking into whether or not it is considered double dipping. The man I spoke to in Colorado wasn't able to give me the answer. I'm working on finding out from Kansas if they know. I would love to be able to use funding that is already there for childcare assistance if possible, I just want to make sure I'm doing it in the right way. :) I'm not sure if I said it above, but thank you for helping with this information. I'm really hoping that it will work out to be useful. I will still need to have enough money for a couple of months of childcare while I go through the application process and such, but that would be a much smaller amount of money to raise elsewhere.
Taz, thank you for your support. I haven't been offended by anything people have said on here. And I don't feel anyone owes me an apology. I really have no problem with people asking me questions and being skeptical. Unfortunately we live in a world where there are a lot of jerks and thieves. While it would upset me if I had donated money to a cause and then found out that the money was used for something else, I do agree that once you give money, it's out of your hands. I'd be upset for being lied to rather than the money being used for something else.
Yvonne, miss yummyness, thank you! You are a sweetheart and I know your words come from the heart and mean so much.
Wayne, yes I have been contacting local businesses. I haven't had anyone say yes yet, other than a donation of $100 in Sonic giftcards to use in a raffle. I've made a list of over a hundred businesses to contact and am slowly making my way through it.
Pipi,
While I cannot donate financially at this point... would you like me to donate a couple of pieces to your jewelry auction? Let me know when it is, if you're interested, and if so, what you're looking for? I have to take a trip to my fav jewelry shop in the next few weeks, so let me know and I promise I will do what I can.
Kate
Kate,
Thank you, that would be very awesome of you. I'll contact you on the board about it more.
Thank you. :)
Pipi